Living on the storey beneath the elephants wasn't easy.

God this smelly Santa disgusting! The mothball odor from the fake suit, Gin fumes escaping from under the kinky cotton beard and the quick rise off his suit from a huge fart

The machine falls on them, because they aggressively shake it to get their snack to fall.

As Gordon sat there I could smell his unpleasant nerves. His resume was more than adequate but I didn't know if he had that "it" factor we needed. I said "Mr. Durasno, please

This story is about the friendship of 2 spotty dogs, their adventures from the Sahara desert to the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem, their eventual marriage and bizarre deaths in Cairo.

A day in the life of Daisy Mae... Stretch... Yawn... Sniff... "Ahhh, waking up to yet another beautiful day."

She sat with her back against the blood soaked walls and stared at the shadow in front of her. She wasn't afraid, she made him do this. After all what is a mutant monkey without

Lindsey erupted into a laughter frenzy after witnessing her friend, Molly, crash and burn on the go-ped while attempting to impress with "stealth" and swift moves. What a wipe out

The volcano erupted bleeding black ash across the tropical island and there in the cloud was a figure, flying it was Israel 'IZ' Kamakawiwo'ole with a cape and a ukulele

Nobody bought the 50 lbs. bag of groats at the whole foods market. It had been placed way in the back behind the flax seed crumpets. There, it sprouted tendrils and became sentient

Writing Boot Camp: The drill sargent yells. "Finish your folds.You've got 4 minutes! And anyone uses penis, or makes fart jokes gets to clean the latrine! Private Folder Ryan types

After the Great Atomic Cleansing all that were left was a new strain of human. They were cancer-proof and able to generate their food from the sun like plants. In that time

And there i saw it, it was big, it was harry, and i was cold

Well, I don't feel like going into it but if you really must know, it happened on one of those kind of Mondays when you have to drag yourself out of bed. The alarm clock

THE CHEESE OF DOOM PART 1 The cheese of doom. It never sleeps. It just watches you from the fridge. Wanting to be eaten. It's the cheese of doom.

Ginger Ale makes me burp! *URP!*

Ted Turner was finally broke. Sure, he had a lot to say, but no one cared anymore. The awful truth was that he was the equivalent of

I'm a little teapot, short and stout.

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. It was also going to be the end of the world. Only one person could save it but right now I didn't know who.

I sneezed and she said "Gaia bless you". I screwed up my face in a frown and said "What?" She said "Surely you realize