I couldn't remember. I knew I'd cleared my history, but what about my cache? They couldn't bust you for cookies could they?

Bart was tied to his mother's apron strings since birth. This became problematic when he grew to over six feet tall, his feet bumping along clumsily behind his mother as she

Cramer slumped in the corner at the holiday party.He was shy, awkward, didn't know how to talk to women. He was also quite homely. But when he stood, unaware, beneath the mistletoe

Ned was nihilarian aquaintance and avid mungo who haunted the NYC municipal dumps. He wore a floccinaucinihilipilificatious Finnimbrun around his neck, an selcouth mix of it items

Dear Princess Celestia, you have thirty minutes to move your chariot, or your chariot will be crushed into a cube. Yours sincerely, the Canterlot Traffic Control.

A freshly sharpened pencil. Your favorite song. Cool water on a hot day. Hot water on a cool day. A good joke. The second beer. Requited love. Wildflowers. Snow on Christmas Day.

"Anything liquid, flammable, perishable, or hazardous in here sir?" "Nope, just a book." Inside was a fruit salad mixed with gasoline stored in a glass bowl. I was sending my ex

Criminee, Mama's at the sewing machine again. She's gonna make me wear whatever she's making. From the looks of it, I'll soon be sporting some camouflage footie pajamas. The one

The Ratgod checked his Chinese horoscope for 2013 and learned, to his dismay, that this is the year he would most likely experience loneliness.

Obama and Cameron woke in a strange but cheery bungalow. "Good morning, good morning, good morning!" Putin was also there and turned out to be an excellent breakfast chef. Village

The Jesus's Lawn Care van arrived right on time Wednesday morning. I thanked God every day I'd found him. What a nice guy, and the lawn had never been greener. One day Jesus

"My name is PurpleProf and I (deep breath) am a Foldaholic." I sat down.

I made you a chocolate chip cookie but it came to life and it was so tasty that it ate itself.

"This sentence is no nonsense for this nonsense is no sentence." The purple hatted wizard proudly read to the group of confuzzled young lads.

"I swear, I just wanted to buy a kite! Rapul's got the best!" "Sure, sure, fine. But the Taliban are never going to believe that. You better leave out the back; fast." I ran for

The Singularity appeared on the horizon. The naysayers could no longer deny it's existence. Neither evil nor good the Singularity merely existed for the same reason as the rest of

We are born to die, and we die to live, so what's the point in living life if it just contradicts?

Accurately interpreting nonverbal communication codes is harder than one might think. For example, most people think that liars are not able to maintain direct eye contact, but

As I walked through the house wearing nothing but a jersey and slippers

It had been such a long time since I had a deluxe chimichanga from El Diablo's Taco Emporium, and I'm not sure I ever did, but I was suddenly overtaken by a craving for one, and I