It was then that I decided to become a symbiote.

It was then that I decided to become a symbiote. Why deal with the hassle of driving to a supermarket and shelling out half your paycheck for food when you could just get your

nutrients from the thoughts of small minded people? I loved my new life as a symbiote. Angry thoughts are chewy, annoyance is crunchy but my favourite - boredom- is buttery and

with a beer aftertaste. As a symbiote I decided to gorge on boredom. I forced my host to go to church, then to an insurance seminar, then to an inter-faith dialogue symposium.

My mum needed shower curtain rings so I gave them to her. Dell Griffin was her guardian angel at a time when she was broke. I got a reward, which will be a surprise. Good enough.

"No, not good enough!" said Capt. Shower Curtain. He flew into my Mum's bathroom cowled in a shimmering shower curtain made of fairy dust. He told her its fine fabric was invisible

and mildew resistant, but my Mum just screamed at the sight of a naked man in her bathroom. Captain Shower Curtain screamed back because she had all ready pulled down her knickers

and it's a damn shame...that's all he could say, over and over, again: It's a damn shame!" For thirty years, nobody threw a whistle her way...nobody contorted their eyes and neck

to look at her, nobody dare mention her name. For she was but a mere memory nowadays. That's what fame does to you, you see. One day you're hot, the next you're not. She just

vanished from the world's stage. I hear she's moved to a little cottage in the mountains where she paints pictures of the local bird life. Maybe she'll finally feel at peace.