As I walked out into the sun, cop hands on

. On the upside, I thought as I was shoved into the backseat of the cruiser, going to prison meant I'd probably see most of my family again. We could do a prison family reunion!

Aunt Cookie could make up a big batch of toilet hooch and I bet cousin Milstain could prolly swipe one'a them jumbo tuna cans from the mess hall. Shoot, this arrest was looking up.

"Woo'wee an can's smell that stanky good down home swamp Jambalaya e'en b'fore I seen the s'weet penteshury walls" But them ornery Guards got a wiff o'somepin, cause Aunt Cookie

gave me a good old fashioned whuppin' for talkin' like some backwoods Cajun halfwit, when I was actually a Harvard graduate and CEO of a major corporation. So what if I had

children that I didn't claim, I was a true Ivy Leaguer. Personal responsibility was an option. After being yelled at, I pinky-tightened my eye brows, allowing my awesome retort

to emerge in its fullness. One might be mistaken into thinking that my purpose was clear and cohesive, that all of my faculties were aligned in one sole project. One might be but

You never know what what the universe has in mind. Sometimes you get skunked, sometimes you dont . Please do not roll in the dirt when visiting the forest preserve. Skunks aren't

nice people to mess with. They believe that everyone is against the, and believe whatever they want you to." said the confused troll, named Dhali for he was lead astray by Vishnu

, or took a wrong turn at 48th street, he had never really been sure. When he finally found his way back home everyone sang "Hello Dhali" and there was much jocularity ever after.