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The 27th Prophet of Earth liked his beer

  • The 27th Prophet of Earth liked his beer and pretzels -- but he never had any intention that these should become required sacraments for residents of The One. He watched in dismay

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  • as his alma mater's football team got slaughtered in the Vatican Chastity Bowl -- literally so, as Jehovah rained lightning bolts up and down the sideline. The 27th Prophet changed

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  • quarter backs and asked Jesus to throw a Hail Mary pass to his best wider receiver Johny Patmos. Unfortunately Jehovah knew the Saints gameplan already and

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  • was plotting to use distraction tactics. Strippers, fireworks and ridiculous stick man formations outta do the trick, but young Grew Cheese got the almighty Jesus pawing powers

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  • from the Lord's dog, Ghost. Beer erupted from the Flying Spaghetti Monster's volcano and strippers began marching out of the factory, signaling that the Inter-Panetheon Dogshow had

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  • finally entered intermission. A sea of patrons surged to the nearest restrooms, trampling thousands of factory fresh strippers, causing panic among investors and deities alike.

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  • One of the strippers was my ex-girlfriend Jenny. I swore under my breath to Billy and asked if we could go back into the theater, but it was too late. She was already moving

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  • about the stage like a curious rat, jerking off her clothing in a manner devoid of allure. "You dated her?" gasped Billy. Jenny jumped around spastically then fell off the stage.

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  • The audience collectively inhaled. It was one of those moments in which they weren't certain whether to take this as tragedy or comedy. One clever goer texted Mel Brooks.

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  • "Hi Mel Brooks. Please stand up where I can see you."

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2 Comments

  1. Crazydance Feb 17 2016 @ 14:43

    Passing turned into Pawing. Interesting.

  2. smashysmashy Feb 17 2016 @ 14:46

    Same thing happens to me at lady's night.

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