A sign here reads "Reading Railroad." To

  • A sign here reads "Reading Railroad." To your east is the IRS. To the west you see the edge of Oriental Ave. You hear a strange whistling in the air. Arcane rogue, what do you do?

  • A large pair of white cubes collide into the ground several feet away from the railroad and you find yourself walking down Oriental Ave. Beyond that, a massive question mark hovers

  • . A man approaches. "Hey, go to the nearest utility and pay up 10 fold. If it is unowned, you could buy it." In the distance, you see a gigantic silver terrier.

  • You're afraid of dogs so you turn down Marvin Gardens St. and find $200 in a crumpled paper bag in the alley next to the jail. Crossing the railroad tracks you see a hobo with B.O.

  • , you thrust the bags of dollars into his hands and run off straight into a wall. Concussed you wander the streets until you find a hotel in Mayfair. It's pricey so you mortgage

  • your home to pay for the deluxe penthouse suite & throw the biggest bangin' party since Elton John's wedding. Then, because you are not thinking quite straight, you call Sir Elton

  • John "David Bowie", causing him to assume his animal form: the platypus. You kick the platypus into pool of lava, your favorite party affectation, and call on the band to strike up

  • a conversation with those bedraggled people in the back of the room. The platypus had a lot of eye shadow on. Despite your orders, the band doesn't know what to say to the crowd.

  • "Hey, why don't we sing instead?" the drummer said. "Yes!" agreed the bass guitarist. "We can sing what we say!" The vocal shot himself in the head as the platypus applied lipst

  • The Platypus was Perry the Platypus, who started to rule the band, until he died of Heroin overdose.



  1. Zetawilk Jan 01 2015 @ 14:08

    This is my favorite kind of story.

  2. lucielucie Jan 01 2015 @ 14:18

    Mayfair is the most expensive street on the London version of Monopoly.

  3. zxvasdf Jan 02 2015 @ 09:33

    You can never call Elton John David Bowie. That's a whole lot of wrong there, and the guy was justifiably pissed about it

  4. Zetawilk Jan 02 2015 @ 09:37

    On the other hand, one gets the impression you can call David Bowie whatever he wants (Goblin King, guy from Twin Peaks).

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