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Over the years, I realized that popularity

  • Over the years, I realized that popularity looses its value which leaves the popular people with no more power.

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  • I learned this to my own regret as I became increasingly unpopular over the years, which made me a little bitter yet humble, and incredibly powerful. I was afraid I might misuse

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  • my powers for evil purposes, like when I planted herbivorous tomatoes in my neighbor's tomato patch. "Good lord," he said. "A couple are obese, but the rest have been sucked dry."

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  • But that was nothing compared to the elephant squash. It started with the smaller vegetables & worked its way through his tubers swelling to barrel size. Barney tried composting it

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  • but was arrested for composting because he was in Orange County. He was charged with "eco-terrorism" for not using pesticides and chemical fertilizer. He was put in a cell with

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  • the home office zoning manager from Stew Leonard's. Or whatever his job was. The 2 were at the mercy of not just any cracker justice: Spoiled-rich, self-entitled cracker justice.

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  • Justice...there's no greater justice than a dormant fold rising from the bowels of FS to publish 4 years later. But it'll take a village to make that happen, a village full of

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  • highfalutin kit shickers. If we band together then Shirley can be Don. Wait, spell-check that, please. The folder monkeys are hardly the best typists. Let's bring this story to

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  • Hell's furnace and feed it the folder monkeys; every Spoonerism. Now...starting over: If we band together, Shirley can be Squiggy and Laverne can be...ah...forget the whole stupid

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  • thing. I'm thirsty. Who wants a margarita?

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