once upon a time

once upon a time

who just hated the whole amassing gold cliche. Why couldn't dragons horde Hummel figurines or old license plates? And this deep dank cave was wrecking havoc with his joints.

He considered moving into a nice condo or something. Maybe getting contact lenses - nobody seemed to think a dragon who was near-sighted and needed to wear glasses was very scary.

But he continued to sublet the cramped cave from his domineering mother. The bats crapped on his scaly dragonwings while he squinted at the lead miniatures he painted. "Marvin, get

yer lazy butt over here & scrub these bunions off my feet!" Marvin did, but later that night he took out the copy of Dark Magic he'd stolen. He turned to page 4: domineering mother

goose nursery rhyme. The one about the shoe. "Damn!" Marvin thought, how am I gonna

tell Wellington that the Earl of Uxbridge has had his leg blown by a canon? Marvin thought it would best if he gave Wellington the news during a ball at Goodwood Manor. The Battle

ensued on the front lines. The clever Wellington figured it out all by himself when he saw Marvin enter the ball with only 1 leg. The band struck up the Hokey Pokey, embarrassing

the Martian who could not perform one-fifth of the dance routine. It didn't bother him as much as was hoped, since he couldn't dance the Venutian Tentacle Beast version either.