The vast systems of caves dug into the cliffs

The vast systems of caves dug into the cliffs were 33 miles northwest of DeMoines. No one knew what

they were for except my confederates & I: Deep Underground Military Bases put there by the Illuminati to hide their secret armies. We entered the caves with infrared fatigues

towards the band room. A few band geeks were hanging out right by the door. Delta Squad gagged-n-bagged them before they could warn the Illuminati. Suddenly the music stopped.

They all jostled to claim chairs. Delta Squad Major Chet Smart got left out. And it turned out the band geeks were magic geeks, so the rest of Delta Squad was bagged. Musi

cians who go to band camp learn far more than where the most advantage place to put a flute is. Late at night the decks come out and magic the gathering is the word of the da

bears........da bears.......da bears........da bears.........O my god look at her bear.........dat bear doe....So tell them this

: The giant, man-eating, rainbow-coloured bears of old are back, and they're hungry. So if you don't want to be torn to shreds and have those shreds eaten by us bears then

prepare. And make sure you do so well. To engage in combat with these creatures is a death sentence. I only hope that between now and your encounter, they come to discover mercy.

Now go. I will either see you in battle, or meet you in Hell.