Hypothesis: Warning labels are for pussies.

  • Hypothesis: Warning labels are for pussies. Procedure: 1) Take more than twelve aspirins in one day; 2) Get drunk, then operate machinery; and 3) Swallow Listerine. Conclusion:

  • They have some hot nurses at the emergency ward. Hypothesis 2: Quadraplegics get sympathy dates. Procedure: 1) Ask for help going to toilet. 2) Ask for help pointing. Conclusion:

  • Oh wait, Quadraplegics use bedpans. That's not going to work. Maybe with some soft music playing? No? How about some soft "assistance" in the sponge bath? No? Embarrassed, he

  • took a shaky breath, trying to figure out how to romance this beautiful quadriplegic woman. Ever since she came to the hospital, Nurse Andrew had been smitten with schoolboyish

  • fantasies of beheading drug-dealers and infidels and laying their innocent bodies tenderly at her bedside, as a token of his good graces. But what if the beautiful, limbless lady

  • rejected him? The thought made him snarl. The beautiful, limbless lady still had the power over him. He pushed her towards the pool. The only to keep her forever was to

  • help her catch all the Pokemon. She may have been a quadruple amputee, but that didn't mean he couldn't help her fulfill a lifelong goal starting in a public swimming pool. "Glub

  • Glub was the first, and the best -- but you can be better. Courage. Determination. And above all, fear of drowning." She gulped, but then toughened, and nodded. He tossed her into

  • the deep end of the pool & watched her flail around for about 5 minutes before she gulped & glubbed. Her head went under & he watched her staring eyes sink to the bottom. But then

  • she rears up splashing. Not dead! Remember, just like the ending of that French film. The one which makes you choke on your popcorn & your date has to do the heimlich manoevre.



  1. lucielucie Oct 20 2013 @ 05:48

    Les Diaboliques - I just looked it up - FYI.

  2. SlimWhitman Oct 20 2013 @ 06:14

    Miraculously cured her Quadraplegia too.

  3. Zetawilk Oct 20 2013 @ 09:02

    It's a good film, lucielucie. It was shown on TCM this year, if I recall correctly.

  4. PurpleProf Oct 20 2013 @ 09:27

    Her name must be "Bobbie." What a valiant heroine.

  5. lucielucie Oct 21 2013 @ 06:24

    I only remember the eyes under the water in that film & I'm not even sure I remember that correctly.

  6. Zetawilk Oct 21 2013 @ 10:55

    I don't...I remember how gritty everything looked though. How real the construction of the buildings felt. It was ultra-noir. TCM has such delicious treats every now and again. I couldn't stay up late enough last night, so I've recorded and yet to watch some silent film about witches (Haxan, with some umlauts or something) and this Japanese anthology of ghost stories (including the Yukionna, if I recall correctly). I remember being initially amused with the title of "Les Diaboliques" because "Les Miserables" is still fresh in my mind as a wholly excellent experience and adaptation of the musical. Of course, from my limited knowledge of Italian, I'm guessing "Les" might be French for "the," and titles tend to begin with "the" from what I've seen. I try to avoid titles starting with "the" and female names ending in "a" if I can. Sometimes though, you just gotta forge new frontiers.

  7. lucielucie Oct 21 2013 @ 12:31

    Baisers Volés (Stolen Kisses) is the last French film I saw & one of my favourites & it doesn't begin with 'the'.

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