I have never been as offended as the day

I have never been as offended as the day I discovered that I lost followers on folding story. My self esteem was crushed more than the time I received the least amount of likes.

I'm funny, dammit. I wish the cyberworld would appreciate it more. I LIVE for FoldingStory. I sadly crawled downstairs to my parents basement & logged on to see if I had any

comments on my dungeons and dragons blog. Sadly, I had none as always. I decided, I needed pity friends, so I went on Facebook and put a sad face with the words "mom died, poop."

I was expecting thousands of replies grieving over my (fake) loss. I would read them all, absorb them all and take pleasure in their apparent sincerity.

Then what I would do would write a lot of fake thank-you's back to those people.

I'd put quotes around words like "dear," "thank" and "sincerely." Then I'd add a post script: "I wish you could hear the sneering, sarcastic tone of my voice as I read this aloud."

(Sarcasm is my middle name. I'm so good at it, most people can't even tell when I'm being sarcastic, unless I point it out.) I prefer not to write letters. Face-to-face sarcasm is

Throw the finest tea parties. This was important if they were going to get those tax collectors drunk before the grand rebellion. They decided to have it in Boston, and

Samuel Adams rose from his pew, and announced, “This meeting can do nothing more to save the country!” But nobody was listening because they could hear screams coming from