I'm dreaming of a White christmas cos I've

  • I'm dreaming of a White christmas cos I've never seen a white christmas before. It's always been in the movies. someday maybe I'll go to the North pole during Christmas time and th

  • en I'll see the whitest Christmas ever! I better hurry though, with all the global warming and that. I bet Santa has already his sun lotion and trunks prepared. And the polar bears

  • are all hopped up on Coke, chocolate, and Skittles so it's an extra fun party up at the Pole right about now. I wanted to really make an entrance when I arrived this year so I

  • dressed as a penguin, I thought I'd be the only in the costume because everyone knows that penguins don't live in the North Pole, well when I got there, the party was thrown by Coc

  • o Chanel. I'd misunderstood the "costume party". A 'penguin' was a chic way to say Tux. I was the only 'Only' at the party. An 'Only' is someone whose only there for entertainment

  • of the rich. I was in a penguin costume at the Presidential Inauguration Ball, thanks to my misunderstanding of current cultural lingo. Obama sat in a corner crying. I waddled

  • over to the snack table and poured my secret ingredient into the punch. Then I just sat back and waited for the fun to begin.

  • Everyone's bodies evaporated, track suits and all, except for their Nikes. "Perfect," I said. I would add them to the ones I stole next to the ball pit. No shoes were safe whilst

  • I, that one monkey with the shoe fetish from London zoo, escaped from the MI5 testing laboratory with their bodily-sans-shoes evaporator. I stole all the shoes I could want until

  • I realized they were size 15. Really? Who wears freaking size 15 shoes besides clowns & maybe KIngKong. The monkey joined me when he noticed my stash. Then the sun started to set.



  1. KieferSkunk Sep 04 2012 @ 14:22

    Unfortunately, I wear size 15 shoes, and I'm not a clown or a giant gorilla. *sadface*

  2. CrazyBananas Sep 04 2012 @ 14:52

    Did I say size 15? Nah, I meant size 19 -- yeah, that's it. :)~

  3. Zetawilk Sep 04 2012 @ 21:20

    What nation are we sizing the shoes by?

  4. KieferSkunk Sep 04 2012 @ 21:26

    Cambodia, I think.

  5. KieferSkunk Sep 04 2012 @ 21:27

    By the way, which one of you is the second banana here? :)

  6. Zetawilk Sep 04 2012 @ 22:07

    I was first.

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