They had enjoyed twenty years of blissful,

They had enjoyed twenty years of blissful, harmonious marriage when Jake became startled to find that his wife secretly harbored bigoted views.

"I just don't trust that Conan O'Brien," she said as she watched the TV. Jake put down his Sudoku, "What was that hon?" "I know for a fact all gingers work for the devil."

Jake stared slack-jawed at his wife & scratched his russet beard. "Yes, the 27th circle is reserved for gingers & their unholy spawn," she said. "You mean little Joey?" "Him too

, I'm afraid. " "isn't there some way we could..de-gingerize him?" his wife whispered. Jake dug in his navel with his pinky,smelled it, then wiped it in his russet facial fur.

"The red hair is not the problem, Miss" said the Doc. "Your husband is just a lout, with horrible hygiene and disgusting personal habits." Damn, she thought, now what would she d

o with her curlers? Obviously the Doc was more insightful than she thought. "No, I'm afraid you're terribly mistaked, Doctor", she replied. The red hair has nothing to do with my

illness. It's just a thing I do when I want to feel young again." She thought she had him convinced. The Doc continued to study her temples and pushed his thumbs into the base of

tor scribbled on his pad. "Go on," he droned, as she paused, remembering the horrific moment. "I felt like I was made of paper that had been submerged in water." she said sadly.

It was time for the feast. Everything around the doctor and patient faded to white and silently they watched, perplexed by a widening black circle above. A hungry thing emerged.