Ruth looked at me, waiting for an answer

Ruth looked at me, waiting for an answer - her bright blue eyes magnified by her giant spectacles and the lines on her old, tender face were furrowed in confusion. I finally said "

"Alright, you can checkout any time you like, but you can never leave!".

"Nah freaks, I'm out of here!" I hightailed it out of Hotel California,despite it being such a lovely place, since I had seen enough movies to know not to trust such a lovely face.

service in the world. Since I couldn't afford to build a hotel, I decided to transform my own house into a luxurious hotel. I started with the lobby aka the living room. I bought

new light fixtures, curtains, and went down to the antique shop for this oriental rug that costed a fortune but was the centerpiece of the lobby. Well, that, and the outdated magaz

ine decsribing how to create ham radios out of yarn and twigs. At last my office was ready for its grand opening. I hung up my certificate and waited for the throngs to rush in for

my courses on compost furniture (more comfy as it ferments!), the insulating power of dung bricks (keeps away inlaws too!) & how to grow regenerating moss suits.I'd almost given up

on the Green Man too, but even he'd sprouted a new beard, his verdant tendrils strewn across my lap. Ah yes, this was living! I planted a wet one on Green Man's lips & a daisy grew

from his nose. Another kiss, and a tulip sprouted. Ecstasy! I was about kiss again when asparagus sprouted from his nether regions—an extremely HARD asparagus. I left abruptly.