Whoah - you flatter me, sir! I'm back late

Whoah - you flatter me, sir! I'm back late tomorrow night. E-mail me details; always thrilled to take part in such things.

' He grinned silently as he watched her walk away into the night. He knew she was going to be good, just as his clients would appreciate. He went home, sent her the email and start

ed to noodle around on his harmonium. Next thing, a text pinged it's way through cyberness: NEVER HAVE I BEEN MORE INSULTED IN MY LIFE YR EMPLOYEE IS DEAD His disgruntled clien

t's message screamed from his phone. He couldn't understand why his client would feel that way about a blind date with his secretary, even if her nose looked like a

retha Franklin. Wait a minute (he suddently realized)...his secretary WAS Aretha Franklin! OMG & here for all these years, he'd had no RESPECT for her. And apparently neither did

the CEO, the first in a chain of fools. "Think, think about what you're tryin' to do to me!" she said. "Aretha, it's really you!" I said. "Ain't nothing like the real thing baby!"

"No, it's not really me," Aretha replied. She pulled at a zipper near her forehead and removed the bodysuit. "Dr. Benway Ali Benway!" I cried in elation. "Wrong. Roy Scheider." He

hobbled out of the human suit, a glowing green monster with shiny black eyes called Roy Scheider. He danced and did a jig. I wondered if the suit would fit too loosely on me.

of Old Smoky, on top of James Franco, on top of Slenderman. Most people had a single everyday persona for dealing with the world, but I had responsibilities to consider!