Sandra shook out her long brown hair and

Sandra shook out her long brown hair and looked towards the stairwell. It had been a hell of a day but she knew Sammy would come. He always did.

She could set her watch by Sammy's daily attempts to extract the money she owed him. But Sandra couldn't pay it back because she'd spent it all. Why didn't he get it? So obtuse.

Sandra hated Sammy in a cold, cruel, vicious way. It was a smooth, delicious hatred like melted ice cream. The next time he came for the money, she would set his pants on fire.

This was how the legend began.Sandra made the liar remove his pants. She hung them from the telephone wire. She lit them on fire. Her statuesque figure retreated into the sunset

like a noble savage, an Amazon woman of proportional virtue. Both saintly & sultry, Sandra hitched a ride to the next town in search of injustice & to right any wrongs. Sandra was

no Wonder Woman, but she had earned a fearsome reputation, despite not being able to speak anything but her obscure native tongue. When I met her, she was in the middle of

tying strips of alligator to a branch. She wiped off her hands and looked at me up and down. "Click, click, chug-a-lug, bing-a-bow?" she said. I didn't understand a word.

"What do you mean, 'Click, click, chug-a-lug, bing-a-bow?'," I cocked my head. The alligator lady looked at me and said, "Yeah, it means

pretty much nothing actually." Then she snapped at my ankle and dragged me into the swamp. Screaming, I kicked & clicked, chugged a lug, binged a bow, all in vain. But with rhythm!