I was so jealous of Tony. He had a CB radio,

I was so jealous of Tony. He had a CB radio, an RC Trans-Am, a Color TRS-80, and a portable TV which could receive UHF 'and' FM stations. All I had was pong.

20 years later Tony had the same Trans-Am, a head full of hair plugs, and a warrant out for overdue child support. Meanwhile, I'd become an avant guarde video game designer & lived

across the street so I could watch Tony the Tiger be a Hair Band Rocker and totally under appreciate his wife. She was perfect. And Tony, well he drank an 18 pack of Miller

High Life to camouflage his lowlife tendencies. Tony the Hair Band Tiger would hang around in crowds of Prokaryotes to seem high life-ier by comparison. I took notes on his wife's

bust size and rushed over the publishing house on 42nd Street. Poxy Publishing were very interested in my notes and published them in a book called "Tony's Wife & Her Breasts"

They say never judge a book by it's cover and that was true of Tony's wife too. Of course I published as a ghostwriter & changed the names of Tony's wifes breasts to Perky & Droopy

. Tony read my book and immediately recognized his wife's mammaries featured as central characters. He demanded a cut of my royalties. He wanted to get his wife breast lifts.

What Tony really meant was he wanted to get his wife breast elevators but he was confused. His wife was quite happy with stationary breasts, but went along with his whim. Once inst

But you know what they say...what goes up must come down, eventually anyway. Both Tony & his wife "deflated" after a while. It was OK though. They both also lost their vision.