When Roger refused to consummate their marriageon

When Roger refused to consummate their marriageon their wedding night, Cleo deeply regretted her vow of premarital chastity. But Ross the bellman was happy to step in. As it were.

And 9 months later Roger, who had not warmed to her, was bewildered to find himself the father of twin

twins! That's right, quadruplets. Two boys, two girls, and one big problem. Roger had another pregnant wife two states over and things were stretched as it was. The only option he

had was the one given to him by Aphrodite the goddess of love. She'd made all women who shopped at Walmart fall in love with him. Any children he had must be

brought up in the way's of the hunt and offer their first kill of the season to her. He had no problems with this arrangement and neither did his lovers, but the kids grew up in NY

like a bunch of ugly suckers. So he gathered up his druthers, went on a hunt for sticky Smucker's, fell out with Lindsay Struthers and sang along to "Uncle Fucker". He got pulled

over by his brother who they called Officer Rucker. So he threatened to call their mother who happened to be a trucker. Well, Mother Rucker the Trucker wasn't in the mood for all

this. She was tired from kissing her lollipop. The officer said "Mother Rucker is a tuckered trucker, having puckered a sucker." We just shook our heads.

The officer took Mother Rucker's sucker from her weary lips and let her go. HE was the sucker, because as soon as Mother Rucker pulled her 18-wheeler back onto the interstate,

she drove over his pet cat called mincey. Mother Rucker then drove to Lollypop Land a confectionary store she had invested in and Mother Rucker sold to the biggest suckers.