I am a Son of Amber, living in the wrong
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I am a Son of Amber, living in the wrong world. My Trumps destroyed, my smartphone dashed, my pow'rs enfeebled, I await my fate in this opaque and arbitrary excuse of a world, as
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night falls like a curtain at the end of the final act. I'd failed to reach the Obelisk in time. I slumped down under the weeping willow, my head in my hands. Krystal must be dead
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by now, and frozen by the creeping mists of the Diddly Dell. A magic potato bug spoke to me, "it is never too late until you give up." "You mean I can still save Krystal?" "No,
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you can't save Krystal. You need to give up on Krystal. She's the exception to the rule." The magic potato bug opened its jewelled wing cases & buzzed off. Ghastly Diddly Dell
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gave me the stink eye. He knew I refused to believe the magic potato bug. Krystal was my 1 & only love. Ghastly Diddly Dell shook his head. "Get her out of your mind or you'll be
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like Max von Laue.who broke up on her regular lattice, his mind scattered in reciprocal space." Diddly didn't know squat about the allure of her body centered cubic. I loved Krysta
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but god did she gossip incessantly. Max Von Laue sent crazy vibes across the room and Diddly did his best to understand them. Krysta watched all this and smoked a clove cigarette
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. I looked at Krista, soooooo hip with that clove cigarette, long blue fingernails and left side head shave, and Max Von Laue with his hipster mustache...and suddenly felt nauseous
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Krista and Max looked at me, then at each-other, and pulled out katanas. I cursed under my breath. This was what I got for being late on a payment to the head of the hipster mafia.
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What is there to do at this point besides lay down and accept my imminent death under the hands of hipsters. "NO!" I say. I pulled out my phone and called in an air strike.
7
- Started
- 2014-08-28 21:09:41
- Finished
- 2014-11-03 14:37:45
10 Comments
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SlimWhitman Nov 03 2014 @ 16:27
Son of Amber, do not despair! Your smartphone is empwerd!
BlastedHeath Nov 06 2014 @ 19:31
Thank goodness for magic potato bugs!
Gibber Nov 06 2014 @ 22:51
The potato bug, AKA Jerusalem cricket, is a huge insect that moves in a repulsively sluggish manner. In real life they are not known to have magical properties. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jerusalem_cricket
BlastedHeath Nov 14 2014 @ 20:11
It comes as no surprise to me that potato bugs have no magical properties in this distant and disturbing shadow of the world I call my home. Except for the ones with jewelled wings ...
lucielucie Nov 15 2014 @ 00:21
Everything about the potato bug came as a surprise to me. I didn't realise it was so huge and morose. I'd imagined it was some kind of beetle about the size & shape of my thumbnail.
Gibber Nov 15 2014 @ 01:27
You learn something new everyday on Foldingstory.
lucielucie Nov 15 2014 @ 06:52
... about squid mainly.
Gibber Nov 16 2014 @ 00:25
Squid fact for the day: "Penis elongation has been observed in the greater hooked squid; when erect, the penis may be as long as the mantle, head and arms combined. As such, deep water squid like M. ingens have the greatest known penis length relative to body size of all mobile animals" Animals with larger penises are immobile!
lucielucie Nov 16 2014 @ 15:43
Speechless :o
pinky Jul 25 2017 @ 19:55
Sqeeeek! I see what you mean about learning something new here every day, Gibber. Now if I could just scrub my minds eyeballs...