One day I was walking down the road when,

Oh my goodness oh my goodness, what the

dealy, yo? The hip hop interrogatory rang throughout Disney's Matterhorn ride. The ride had stopped. They trapped at the peak. The animatronic snow beast

was replaced by the amniotic beast, and Disneyland was never the same again. This is what happens when anti-abortion activists gain control of

people's morals. Everything falls apart, and one after another, major corporate bodies such as Nike lose money. But this chain doesn't have to continue. All you have to do is

go back to the barter system. If more people were required to thresh grain before getting an Xbox, they might have fuller lives and meaningful deaths.

My 8 year old frowned at me. "Right Dad, sure, like whatevs". I handed him a scythe. "You shall pay me in calluses. Two calluses for dinner. Four for dessert. An Xbox costs

a year's worth of correctly sorted recycling into the blue crate, the clear recycling bags, the large bin with the green lid and the black bin. No 8 year old could possibly succeed

in the task before little Peter G. but Pete was no ordinary 8 year old. Not only was all the green glass, PET plastic, and paper in the right bin, but the cadmium and lead batterie

s were also in place. Everything was ready to go,or so Pete thought. Just as he was preparing to finish, his mom called, "Petie! Time for dinner! Lasagna!" Pete dropped it & ran.