"Don't you call me a mindless philosopher,you

"Don't you call me a mindless philosopher,you overweight glop of grease now come out before somebody sees you." "▲□▬○┌⌂∩╒♦◄▐" "Secret mission?What plans? What are you talking about

∩╒♦◄ -- Oh *@&$%! You've got me doing it, too! Are you happy?! Tell me right now in plain English what this 'secret mission' business is all about before I get *really* mad."

long breath and a patient sip of whisky preceded the answer: "OK! I own you that. But you must know, this information will bring you consequences: your life won't be the same..."

I woke up on the top of the Empire State Building, but the sun was moving to the east and everything was going backwards. Was I still dreaming? I decided to jump, the wind rushing

Towards the river, I whooped like tarzan and pretended I was king kong. Crowds watched and held out a trampoline and looked nervously up as I fell. I woke up at home with my cat!

"Are you OK now Sir?" asked a doctor as he shone a light into my eyes. I screamed at the pain that the light caused, and the cat jumped in surprise. The doctor was offended that I

yelled in such horror but Goddamn that really hurt. My mother always thought that I was a little strange but this just confirmed it.

"This confirms it, this, this, this right here confirms it", she said pointing repeatedly at this moment. "You know that I love you, that you're my son, but damn kid, you are stran

ger -- far stranger -- than your REAL biological father!" 'Gee, thanks Mom. I appreciate you saying that," her son replied as he got into his car, shut the door & drove far away.