He seated the cabbages with respect and served

He seated the cabbages with respect and served them bowls of buckwheat groats and cups of fine black tea. Most people were inconsiderate savages, but he felt comfortable and hoped

this small but lovingly prepared meal would sway the cabbages to accept him as one of their own.He understood their gravitas&sought to bring kindness to their miserable cruciferous

patch of garden. The cabbages had been through many wars against the snails. In the past few seasons cabbages had been devistated by a slug invasion. The garden wars had taken its

"Salt and burn," said a lone voice. Anxious eyes darted back and forth. "Should we?" The pacifist cabbage warriors had staunchly adhered to non-lethal weaponry against the slugs.

The lone voice belonged to a cabbage patch doll. He wanted to use salt on the slugs. Then a pacificist cabbage warrior said, "It'll do no good. The slugs have kevlar salt vests

. We should try to negotiate a truce. Slugs love their hatchlings too." But they other cabbage patch kids feared the snails and put a Trojan cabbage in the patch filled with

elite cabbage patch soldiers. The slugs were suspicious, but when the cabbage patch kids explained that the Trojan cabbage was an offering to My Little Pony, they relented. Foolish

cabbages. Did they think My Little Pony chose its popularity? All they did was slay Barbie's foundations. But greedy toy companies had the last laugh. Hasbro's shark tank waited

until the Yellowstone caldera erupted and blocked out the sun to introduce their toddler-sized My Little Generator powered by treadmill, stationary cycle, or hand crank!