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I'm so bored I should...

  • I'm so bored I should...

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  • go for a walk on this beautiful day but then

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  • a giant portuguese shrimp came out from under the ground and started talking. "hue hue hue hue hue," and with that it left. Soon after another shrimp emerged and soon the entire

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  • beach was covered with them all marching toward the bathers in step chanting "hue hue hue hue". They were tiny shrimp but their sheer number was overwhelming.

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  • They were after Hugh Grant because of a strange fiasco with a large prawn and soft shell crab.

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  • Somehow the aquatic crustaceans had scored Hugh Grant a pre-street-date copy of Pokemon White 2, and they were after him like crazed Pokemon fans trying to catch Mew under a truck.

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  • Hugh Grant sneered at their offering. The shrimps' little faces crumpled in disbelief. If he didn't want Pokemon, surely he didn't want their bodies. Their succulent pink flesh.

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  • But Hugh Grant's mouth was watering, belying his outward emotion. Against his better judgment, Hugh stepped closer to the tasty-looking shrimp. In their little shrimpy voices, they

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  • cried "no, no, try the stuffed mushrooms! Have a cheddar wedge!" But Hugh's pupils had turned into tiny shrimps. He had the fever. Hugh grabbed three shrimp at once and dunked them

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  • in a large cup of black coffee.. The last time he'd felt so hung over was when he'd downed that pan-galactic-gargle-blaster. Never again, he sighed.. Never again!

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14 Comments

  1. lucielucie Feb 26 2013 @ 17:43

    So... the shrimp story has emerged. OK, it's not as psychic as the South Beach shenanigans. But here's the thing. I'm English so I speak a subset of American called English. In our dialect shrimp = prawns. It's a tomato/tomato thing. So aquatic crustaceans... are they automatically shrimp? I don't know.

  2. Zetawilk Feb 26 2013 @ 18:37

    What was the question again? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shrimp

  3. lucielucie Feb 26 2013 @ 18:51

    I like the link to shrimp, Mr/Ms Bananas. But this is the link to what I'm banging on about: http://foldingstory.com/48a4t/58902o/

  4. 49erFaithful Feb 26 2013 @ 19:14

    Tempted to link to the Forest Gump bit about shrimp but I've probably done my share of bandwidth hogging due to YouTubage (YouTubery?) I'd say aquatic crustaceans are not automatically shrimp because you've got crabs (hopefully not really) and lobsters, etc. Prawns are really big shrimp but I don't think this instance can be chalked up to psychic abilities since some form of shrimpery (shrimpage?) stayed present from folds 3 - 9. And if you can follow me through all those made up words and pauses then I applaud you.

  5. Zetawilk Feb 26 2013 @ 19:17

    I love seafood. :x

  6. SlimWhitman Feb 26 2013 @ 19:51

    I followed you, but now I'm lost somewhere in Crustacea (Carapacea?) I once read a cience fiction novel about three intelligent species co-colonizing a planet one of the them was crablike. I think there was a parallel story in the novel taking place in a connected universe with humans. Anyone read something like that? Can't remember the author and googling is too easy.

  7. lucielucie Feb 27 2013 @ 04:44

    http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prawn Probably one of the most confusing wiki pages I've ever read.

  8. lucielucie Feb 27 2013 @ 04:48

    What I'm trying to say is: why did I type 'shrimp' when I should have typed 'prawns'? You don't have to answer that question as you're not me. x

  9. 49erFaithful Feb 27 2013 @ 12:31

    My synopsis for my own clarity: A shrimp is a shrimp unless it's a prawn in which case you call it a prawn unless it's a shrimp. Shrimps are shrimp. Prawns are prawns. But sometimes they're each other too. Just know that if you mess up and use a prawn fork to eat a shrimp you've committed a heinous atrocity against nature. Don't even get started on pygmy prawns or jumbo shrimp. That's where the universe folds in on itself. Dangerous territory.

  10. 49erFaithful Feb 27 2013 @ 12:32

    Oh, and no, Slim, doesn't ring a bell... except in that there's similarities to Alien Vs. Predator.

  11. Zetawilk Feb 27 2013 @ 12:50

    I'm scared. :<

  12. SlimWhitman Feb 27 2013 @ 13:14

    "What's in a name? that which we call a shrimp By any other name would taste as sweet." -- Sharron Shrimply, A Crustacean Tragedy

  13. 49erFaithful Feb 27 2013 @ 14:09

    Hmm, I dunno. I'm going to go ahead and have to disagree with Ms. Shrimply there. I believe that a shrimp by any other name (except prawn) tastes like chicken. Which is why they make tuna fish out of shrimp - because it's the chicken of the sea. It's a good thing you guys have me around, to learn you all these facts and clear up confusionalities.

  14. lucielucie Feb 27 2013 @ 14:27

    We're on the prawn/shrimp linguistic fault line where nothing is as it seems. Even the 'crustacean taxonomist Tin-Yam Chan' in the wiki article is real, I was sure he was made up. I don't read scifi so don't know about the book. That quote from Sharron Shrimply is familiar, but I think it's from the play 'Much Ado About Prawns' x

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