I was a world famous best-selling author

I was a world famous best-selling author once, a lifetime ago it seems. How did I end up destitute and having to resort to FoldingStory for my genius writing to reach the world?

Well I'll tell you. It all started the day my publisher refused to publish my book "The rock that was a rock."

So I decided to self-publish "The Rock That Was a Rock". Problem solved. What are publishers meant to do? You're supposed to TELL a story, not SELL a story. We need to EAT. Rocks

were a surprising profitable business. The mining industry say 'pay dirt'. Geologists from around the world raved about my book. I was asked to speak at the Diggers & Dealers confe

-derate brotherhood. Why should the racists not be allowed to read my awesome mining book. When I called them up, I said boy to I have the book for you. They hung up on me because

I said "to" instead of "do" and they thought I was making fun of their articulation. I truly wanted to help make the mining industry more racially diverse with my book. Black Lung

Survivors was going to be a hit motivational book, with matching documentary and History Channel special. People of all races would flock to the coal mines for jobs! My editor

Arthur Henry Roger Donald Christopher Davidson Anthony Charles Richard Hamilton the 31st reviewed the motivational book, matching documentary and History Channel special and said

Years later, the British historian Robert Churchill discovered that AHRDCDACRH the 31st was actually a cow disguised as a monarch. He had a beef with the crown when all was done.