Roland, chef de partie of the Chacune et

Roland, chef de partie of the Chacune et chacun Fantaisie restaurant, had an appetite for sabotage. He'd slip osmium cubes in tourtes so the serveurs would drop unbalanced trays on

Chef Roland always entered his kitchen wearing Jack Boots, a leather hood with zipper teeth, nimple daggers and a bull whip. When the first waiter placed an order for Knockwurst

Chef Roland junk-punched him with the butt of his bull whip. Sausage orders of all types quickly diminished. Most waiters forced their diners into ordering soup or salad. Nothing

Chef Roland did to his clientele dimmed their enthusiasm. No matter how much he swore or insulted their dress sense or humiliated them, they came back for his thin soup w/ lettuce

So much lettuce in fact that he was considering adding all the lettuce to his thin soup making it, he hoped, not so thin anymore. "If only they came with a purpose", he thought to

himself. Then he had the most brilliant idea! "I will call it Honeymoon Soup! Lettuce alone!" And so his multi-million dollar enterprise began. Newlyweds swore by it. Honeymoon

soup came in numerous flavors depending on the wedding couple,for the frigid,iceberg lettuce alone,for the unfaithful,romaine hearts,for smoking newly weds in a chalet, swiss chard

Accompanied by rainbow chard and 1000 typists insurrecting, the sound of which mimicked woodpeckers drilling holes in the newlyweds' house. Next came dandelion greens and collard.

After that the newlyweds were glad that their house was full of woodpecker holes, because the green soup gave them gas like nobody's business. The honeymoon was over.