Floating in a dead can in space. My air is

Floating in a dead can in space. My air is almost out. Once this last bar is out I will only have the air in the 3 spacesuits that are still functional. So I had about 74 hours of

time to find a way out of my predicament. Earth in all its blue & white swirling glory lay below but the escape capsules were jettisoned.Cannibalize Oxygen from the fuel cells?

I hated what I had to do. Oxygen (named after what his farts left you craving for) was a smart dog, & tended to the shuttle's fuel cells (his forte)-but I needed food! Sorrowfully,

A sour after taste remains in my mouth. Who would think Boredom could be more pressing than hunger.

I decided that I would become a cauliflower. That way if anyone ate me their breath would smell funky and it would serve them right! As a cauliflower I wandered, bored, insane and

feeling rather neglected, especially next to Carrot Stick and Broccoli Floret, who always seemed to be chosen over me. I, Cauli Flower ( as I was now known), yearned for

the creamy embrace of a cheesy sauce. Stranded emotionally on the desert of the crudite plate is no place for an anxious brassica... "Dr Goodfeel can see you now Ms Cauli Flower

!" Ms Cauli Flower stalked into the examination room to see the Department Head of Broccoli Institute. Dr Goodfeel ripped off Ms Flower's protective layers and sprayed her with

romancecide, to cure her mites and impotence. Suddenly attracted to male nurse RN Aphid, she flung herself on him. If eating and budding are you kink this was a moment to remember.