Tharg fletched his teeth & gnawed on a pterodactyl

Tharg fletched his teeth & gnawed on a pterodactyl bone seductively then conked Loana on the head with his club & dragged her to his cave. Zorg had advised Tharg that the G-spot

would only reveal its mysteries via an elaborate ceremony involving proto-wombat sacrifice. Tharg ogled Loana busting out of her smilodon furs. Then she regained consciousness and

bashed Tharg's head with a rock, she had no idea she was to be the next sacrifice, due to the ceremonial narcotics used to sedate the victums. Although due to the compound scarcity

they hadn't used quite enough. They also didn't know that she regularly got zonked on Jimson tea so she had a high tolerance. Once free, Tharg's wife grabbed a club and loped off

. When Tharg found his wife missing he howled in rage, "Blarg! Blast it, we have to get her back before she gets any ideas!" The others gasped in horror and sent out a search party

to look for Tharg's wife. Tharg paced along the balcony looking sorry for himself before two minutes later, when the search party returned. "We found her, now what should we do?"

"That was too fast." Tharg said. "You need to let her run more for added suspense." Baffled, the guards let his wife go and she ran back into the woods. "Well? GO GET HER!" Tharg

tackled her under a pine tree, where she ultimately surrendered. "But do NOT touch my shoes, you big oafs!" Tharg's wife sniffled. The guards chained her to a tree & continued

to gently fondle her pair of expensive loafers right in front of her. It was more than the poor waif would handle and after two hours of nonstop shoe fondling, her heart gave out.