The day was gloomy ,the sky was dark. I looked

The day was gloomy ,the sky was dark. I looked as if it was going to blizzarding any minute

"You look blizzardly" certainly was an original pick up line so I accepted the offer & we walked into the snow holding mittens and sharing his hip flask of cider punch

But as we drank, his tone became frosty & I sensed something abominable about him. Still, I had to admit my attraction to his brooding countenance. He led me down the snowy path,

but at the entrance to his cave, after a moment of seeming internal torment, he bade me stop, and he repaired within. My abominable date returned and laid down a bed of furs for me

"TO POOP ON!" is what I wanted to say, just to ruin the mood one more time. Peeing on the fire wasn't enough. Making suggestive motions with the leftover bones didn't dissuade

him. Sickened, I considered lighting my hair on fire. Anything to get me out of this obnoxious blind date. I reached for the bowl of bean chili, preparing my secret weapon.

Moments later, pandemonium erupted, as patrons scurried all over in search of oxygen masks. My horrible date now slumped at the table, unconscious. Those beans burned- but worked!

I look backwards and saw dead bodies still in flames. At least I though they were dead...One of them run after me. Instinctivly i first tried to hide, but i felt myself discovered

by the burning eyes of the hottest woman I'd ever seen. There was an instant spark, but once the flame of our fiery romance fizzled, I was dumped for the Torch. Fabulous 4 me, NOT!