The wind brushed her face with the touch

The wind brushed her face with the touch of a lover left behind. She listened to it as

"The Cliff" was her nickname for her old boyfriend. Tall and craggy, The Cliff had sent her over the edge more than once, but she decided to call him anyway. She had to forget Liam

. She called: "Hi, "The Cliff". I need to ascend your stroppy North face to forget..." Liam wrestled the phone from her hand. "Who are you?" she said. Her amnesia had kicked in

something fierce. She was forgetting stuff like a jack ass a kickin'. She asked her husband who he was. She tried to ride a "tree" to work. She barked at her own reflection.

Yes, Melinda was crazier then an entire asylum full of mental patients. But I still loved her. Only one thing stood between me and the mad beauty: her damned husband.

My wife wanted out of our marriage so I concocted a plan whereby my wife would seduce crazy Melinda's husband. Melinda & I would pretend to be devastated & then we'd live happily

ever after. But (as usual), my wife would not cooperate & decided she wanted Melinda instead. So then Melinda & I concocted a plan, pretending to be in love with our own spouses &

our pets. When our pets tried to hump us we had to pretend to enjoy it so as to keep up the charade for my wife. But then my wife asked to join in and this was just to shameful

. I packed my bags and left, heading to Europe to become a monk. The things I had seen and the things I had done would haunt me forever. I only hoped to wipe my slate clean.