"It's hard not to think that the random combinations

"It's hard not to think that the random combinations of Dadaism contributed to the anything-goes horrors that followed." Andy listened to the silence for a while, then hung up.

Why was this woman calling him at night giving him her opinions on abstract art? Andy was a decorator. He rolled emulsion on walls with loving care. He didn't tip the

nother decorator. Andy had a point. He made this point to her by acting rude and kicking her children whenever he walked by with something heavy. He dropped a lamp on big red

which made the gum all squishy. Andy made a scene of doing manual labor so nobody questioned his artist cred. The sofa wasn't heavy - that was performance art

When the bubbles finally burst they formed a sticky cobweb adhering to his bohemian beard & greasy hair. Andy's head did a great job as flypaper so we let him do his art thang

, which was pretty gross, but we tried to be positive.Who were we to judge? I'd never seen anything quite like it, before or since, not even on the Web. Sticky situations like this

always happened to us, but somehow we always seemed to extract our legs from the web hanging from the ceiling. All except for Claude. He was stuck! "Help me!" cried Claude.

Suddenly a man climbed thru the window wearing a blue unitard, red tank top and swimcap w/ a spider drawn on it & and Ray-bans. He freed Claude from the web, turned to us and said

"I have done my duty." His departure was as sudden as his arrival as he backflipped backwards back out of the window, flipping as he went. "Thanks!" We shouted to him. The end.