When camping in the great outdoors it is

When camping in the great outdoors it is advisable to ensure you pack enough gear to spot UFOs. If you live outside of America these rules do not apply as UFOs only abduct

Americans. That's what happens in the movies anyway. You only ever see aliens going there. They don't seem to go to Pakistan, India or any other country. America is a disaster area

. America is quite literally an alienation. All of the real live Americans have long ago been eliminated, sucked up in a vacuum & emptied out into open space. I shouldn't even be

telling you this because, it'll really bum you out. You see, when the aliens took over America, they banished your bodies into space after downloading your minds into XBoxes.

That was the bros; PS4 users had no $ left for anti-alien missiles and met the XBoxers' fate. Nintendo fanboys fled the aliens' sterility experiments to Japan. Miyamoto fought off

The attempted takeover by Mizuko Kazumi. This took a lot of imagination and hard work. Mizuko and his minions had sixty legs and ten heads, so you can imagine how difficult it wa

s. Almost as difficult as the time Dr. Zykvskvsky and his assistent Schlerk tried to bust into Mrs. Mumu's beauty pagent for uncommonly hideous mushrooms. Schlerk had only one foot

cat Muffin. She slapped at his tiny orange hands. "That's what you think!" After he was long gone, Mrs. Mumu saw he'd "borrowed" her "cranial prosthesis" - a strawberry blond one.

When he was a few blocks from her house, he ducked behind some bushes and took the prosthesis from his sack. "Oh, lovely!" he said to himself and began to eat the strawberries.