well he'd finally done it. Even he had to

well he'd finally done it. Even he had to acknowledge his genius. Mario Batali had made a full leisure suit out of prosciutto. He regally dressed as

a Big Cheese marketing exec for the Food Network costume party. He locked eyes with a mystery guest dressed as a Ritz cracker. But Alton Brown, dressed as dip, cut in on his action

by doubling up on the chips and crisps. "You are what you eat," Alton said. The Food Network costume party, dressed as dip, fruits and nuts, all looked around at him in awkward

his spiced nuts, turned back to the crowd and asked "You want a piece of me HUH?" Alton's "fruitcake" did appear superior to Giada's. Not to be outdone,Giada's doused her cake with

hot sauce and 25 yr old scotch whiskey. Giada lit a match and the entire building exploded. A gas leak had caused the disaster. Prize winning fruitcake was wasted as it

Flew out the window and ended up on 5th ave. damnit, the fruitcake contest was in 4 hours! What can I possibly do now? With time against me, I ran to the closest Ace Hardware, and

bought as many nails and tape measures as I could. Fruitcakes have nails, right? When I mixed the nails, flour, egg & water I barely had any time left, so I stuck the mix in the

concrete mixer. I had uber-quadrupled the fruitcake recipe and the nails were sure to ruin my favorite plastic mixing bowl. I forgot who I had made this for, but I hope the nails

killed them, because I was hoping that Lowly Worm died last year, but he didn't, so I must kill him.