Dressing in the old lady's clothes was something
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Dressing in the old lady's clothes was something he never thought he would do. But Just the thought of his blood soaked uniform made him think that the dress fitted him quite well.
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Mike pulled a curly wig over his head. Now, at least he looked more like an old lady. He opened the bathroom stall slowly and ran for the door, skirt swishing behind him.
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But Mike's hairy legs & a telltale reflection on the freshly washed tile floor were enough to tip off the cleaning lady. She glanced up from the floor grinned appreciatively & said
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"Mike, its so lovely to see your meat and two veg, it is all very distracting!, however I must get back to work." she grabbed her mop and bucket and continued to clean the floors
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. Mike wouldn't be abated though. "Check out this twig and berries!" he grinned. "Somebody dropped some wedding tackle in my lap!" he pointed. Still, she mopped away, seemingly
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enthralled with her Swiffer, not paying him no never mind. Mike shook the twig & berries in front of her face. "Lookee at this!" She waltzed away, whistling a merry tune. Sighing,
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Mike shoved the twig & berries into his pants & tried another tactic. She was SO HOT in her French maid costume, he was almost salivating. "Well," he said to himself, "If I can't
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drool over the body of this young woman, then I'm taking her to the European Court of Human Rights for violating my fundamental right to, inter alia: letch, lurk & fumble." He put
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his stovepipe hat atop his head and departed for the law offices of Letch, Lurk, & Fumble. The firm was expert in European HR litigation, and his case against the young woman
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alas, was dismissed. The stovepipe hat violated the EU Constitution's Preamble, Part I, Title V, Chp. III, Art.I-44(1) & the sustainable accessories clause of the EU Commission.
6
- Started
- 2014-01-05 22:30:51
- Finished
- 2014-02-07 19:03:30
6 Comments
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m80 Feb 07 2014 @ 19:05
Moral of the story: paying no never mind to twig & berries keeps you out of trouble.
PurpleProf Feb 07 2014 @ 19:29
I've been chuckling over this story for a while now... AND, I have to confess, that I didn't understand what "twig and berries" was...figured it out later. Hehheeee!
PurpleProf Feb 07 2014 @ 19:30
P.S. The phrase "not paying no never mind" is a perfectly acceptable phrase here in the deep south. ;)
lucielucie Feb 08 2014 @ 04:50
I like how Mike is so easily distracted from making his quick getaway.
49erFaithful Feb 10 2014 @ 12:26
Had to Google it, and learned a new law term. Keeping us on our toes, LL.
lucielucie Feb 10 2014 @ 14:02
Yes--letch, lurk & fumble have precise definitions in Strasbourg, I believe.