"Top Ten List of Candid Questions to Super

"Top Ten List of Candid Questions to Super Heroes and Their Even More Candid Answers"10)--For The Hulk:Is your poop ever green?--Like the rain forest!

Candid SuperHero Q & A 9/10: Nightcrawler, if your teleports sound & smell like flatulance? What does your flatulance sound & smell like?--A piercing whistle & fresh baked bread.

"Ahh, very nice, very nice." The audience applauded. "Now, Superman, presupposing that kryptonite is unavailable, how would you recommend an enemy attempt to defeat you?"

Superman chugged the rest of his Slurpee. He belched. The sonic blast blew the audience through Dodger stadium's walls in a cloud of concrete, rebar and blood.

He was now Superhero Persona non grata. The CIA "overslept" so to speak, missed several flights from Brazil, but finally arrived, jumped in their CIAmobiles and went after Superman

who was walking in no particular direction. When the CIAmobiles showed up, Superman let out a scoff and said something like, "The fuck are you guys?" And just sort of killed them.

Superman felt a small twinge of guilt. "Uh, Lois, I just sort of killed some guys today for no reason." Lois lowered the Eccles cake from her lips. "Isn't that unamerican?" "Techni

She looked at her saliva-coated nails. "Korean?" she asked in disgusted disbelief. Lois' father had died in that war. Or maybe it was her grandfather. No matter. Superman shrunk in

comparison to her memory of her grandfather. He was the real superhero! Lois walked out without a moment's hesitation, realizing for the first time what a big mistake she'd made.