Last night I found a picture from an old

Last night I found a picture from an old family photo album. It showed my family getting off the boat from Sweden to America 76 years ago, greeted by me. I was 13 when I found it.

The photo also made me sad, however. Here I now was, 89 years old and had no teeth because of all the Swedish fish I had consumed over the years. If only

I had saved the fish bones I could have ground them up with a little epoxy and made me some new choppers. Or maybe not. My old hands shook as I flipped through the photo albums, re

calling my career as a hand model. I had beautiful hands in those days. People would often ask me just to hold guns for them. Little did I know I would be used to model in a bank

er's fantasy. One of the worst kind. Banker, gucci purple label suit. Caviar. Macanudos. Top floor. Awesome view. A weird Saudi over in the corner. All because of my hands.

My beautiful hands crafted this wonderful life for me, thought the banker as he leaned back and shed a single tear. I should live here forever in this dream. Why not? Oh, yeah...

This went viral, much to his embarrassment. His mum thought he was wasting his money-and hers too. "Stop this, we will lose everything!", she pleaded. He listened to his mum and

took the video down from the internet, only thankful that his mother had not seen it. "Or did I?", she asked, and a large blush came over his cheeks. "It was only -", he stammered,

"a d-documentary o-on naturalism!" His mother smiled knowingly: "The only thing natural about that tangled knot of pervs, sweety, was the bed's oak finish. You're doing sex rehab!"