The X-Men could have stopped the bank robbers

The X-Men could have stopped the bank robbers and saved the day, but they were too busy bemoaning that they were mutants and no one understood them. The constant whining started

when Cyclops was disqualified from Olympic Skeet. "It's an optic blast, not a skeet-seeking missile," he cried. Synchronously, Wolverine resorted to cutting, but his healing factor

made that pretty unsatisfying. Thankfully Professor X was cleaning up at the World Series of Poker. The Iceman had a good gig down at the Coors factory but all in all something was

wrong with Professor X's poker strategy. He just kept winning. I couldn't figure out the Prof was cheating, but I knew he was. I'm a cheater. Cheating requires losing sometimes

in order to lure in more suckers. But eventually Prof. X went high on a pair of jacks after everyone went all in and lost all his winnings to that fool cousin of mine Goober.

Goober rolled all about on his translucent green dodecapods, to feign some exuberance at its defeat of Professor X, but Goober's poker face was pretty much

awful. Everyone knew that he was actually thinking about pancakes, and this delicious recipe his grandmother had sent him last Tuesday. Who needs Professor X when you have

Granny Smith apples. But Grandma's neighbor, Snow White, tipped her off about Professor X even before the edges of her last batch of pancakes could brown. Grandma flipped the bird

over in the pan and injected it with saline & anti-mutant serum, then popped it in the oven. Granny Magneto adjusted her helmet & then began to make the batter for the Toad cakes.