He went into the kitchen and got out all

He went into the kitchen and got out all the fixings for the monster sandwich he called "Life". A baguette, a virginia smoked ham, pickles, beer nuts, left over grilled asparagus,

sardines, taco sauce, and the queen of hearts. Yet his monster sandwich of "Life" was incomplete. What was missing?...Aha! It needs to be a triple-decker made from

pain, suffering, and the wails of small children. Shmear a thin layer of first kiss giddiness and alcohol-induced confidence and you've got a complete Life Sandwich. But what's a

giant Yeti doing at my front door? What a polite knock. I'll just go see what he w-

anted before he remembers he's a freakin' Yeti and stops being so tender and gentle.I opened the door and said:"Yes.How can I help you,Sir?" and the Yeti f-

my seeing eye dog time for a w-a-l-k. With the leash looped around the Yeti's food, the dog dragged the Yeti out. I ditched the Yeti outside a Starbucks and went inside

to see what had set the Yeti off in the first place. Ahhh...I spotted the problem right away. BOGO Himalayan coffee beans were on sale and rightfully, the Yeti was upset about it

. You see, the Yeti was very particular about who drank his favorite cup of joe, so when BOGO was offered at affordable prices to the locals, he had no option other than to burn

rubber to buy up every last ounce of it he could find. NOBODY was going to horn in on his business! But alas, the Yeti evaporated before he could return to his mountain.