The whole world had had enough, but only

The whole world had had enough, but only one badass mofo had the guts, the need, and the know-how to pull it off. Bunnicula was going to finally snuff that skank Edward Cullen.

But Bunnicula was garroted by Blade. Blade wanted to kill Edward Cullen, so he pulled a ninja sword dipped in holy water and

I glared at him with my big anime eyes shooting weird ray beams. He screamed back at me his mouth so wide his nose disappeared. I pushed back a stray lock of hair. It was on.

My Mang-o-Matic finally worked! We were both wearing japanese school girl uniforms! I started running around shouting "Gurētosukotto!", which is japanese for "Great Scott"

Thank goodness for those Rosetta Stone tapes. I looked over at Fernando, and he looked so much better than I did in the uniform. Alas, we had a job to do, I grabbed the mangos, he

grabbed the bongos, and before you could say "What the hell is going on?", we were partyin' like it was 1999. Or maybe 2013.

What a difference 14 years made on our partyin' lifestyle. Back then we thought we'd never settle down and work at regular day jobs. We just wanted to bang on the drums all day.

And now? Now the drums bang on us all day...in our heads, at work, at home, everywhere, everywhere banging drums. There is really only one way to stop it, so pull up to the bar &

order one of their cheese rolls. Roll the dense cheese between your fingers until it resembles a silkworm cocoon. Insert the cheese into your ears ---- silence.