I was working late one night at work, when

I was working late one night at work, when I went to the bathroom I found a stinky man taking a dump with the cubicle door open.

"Well, howdy-do!" said the man cheerily. I tried to look away, but it was impossible because the man sitting there on the commode looked exactly like Jimi Hendrix.

yet he was doing his best Elvis Presley impersonation (swallowing quaaludes, sucking down bourbon, and eating a peanut butter and banana sandwich) all while relieving himself. Yet,

He felt that there was something missing from his life. He knew he was a damn fine Elvis, always had been, but that wouldn't sustain him.

He needed to branch out. Fat Elvis, maybe? Madonna? Pink Gorilla? Yes! That was it! Pink Gorilla! He tossed his Elvis wig into the drawer, and looked online for the perfect

name than Quick Draw McGraw? Then again, that might be taken the wrong way by a fellow furry at the convention. Perhaps I will stick with Dander Darkraven. Yeah, that will get

you nowhere sparky! You see, this convention belongs to me. I am the Convention Overlord. I charge bazillions of dollars just so you can stand in line and look at me frown.

stride around & give a self deprecating chuckle. Then I declaim, exclaim and proclaim. When I'm done, you are ALL the wiser because I am TED, yes, the original talking TED. The TED

you all thought was DEAD!!! The audience gasped in horror as TED whipped off his rubbery mask to reveal his ghastly skeleton face.