Hejzan killar! Det var en dag då jag skulle

Hejzan killar! Det var en dag då jag skulle gå till skolan. Då kom en brun drake och stampade på min tå. Aj sa jag!

Varför ska du stampa på min tå?

Det är en svensk fotmassage. Du inte känner blodcirkulationen förbättras i fötterna?

Said the handsome and tall swedish gentleman. John, who had recently arrived in Stockholm felt uneasy. This beautiful man was offering a smörgåsbord of unidentifiable cold food and

slightly rotten squid. "Sven, while I appreciate your outlandish ways and amusing customs.." John began, pinching what looked like a soggy cracker with his fingers,

but I am not interested in your sardines...nor your Swedish meatballs." Sven was devastated, but kept a stiff upper lip. John licked the soggy cracker from his mustache, inciting

much delight from the facial hair fans who threw their knickers at John. An elderly facial hair fan hit Sven in the face by accident with her large brown panties. Sven looked

ready to ring the bell. With new University hazing prevention rules, we'd had to get creative with this round of pledges. The panties slid off Sven's face as a facial hair fanatic

slathered Chia pet seed over his face and chin and cheeks. The man was an artist with making the craziest, most unnatural beards. The deans would be none the wiser, this year.