Will there ever be a time that hot cheese

Will there ever be a time that hot cheese sandwiches are not appreciated anymore? The crunchyness of the bread, the gooey runnyness of the cheese, ah the delight of the cheese that

like plastic loses its shape when heated, glistens in artificial lighting and cannot be digested. Bobby Flay slapped me across the face. "Fool! Cuisine is PAIN!"

I swallowed a portion of the silicone meal. It certainly looked real. An old Japanese proverb says "The eyes must also eat". Bobby Flay's tour of restaurant Shokuhin-Sanpuru strai

ned international relations to 1944-esque levels. The Japanese meals looked equisite but everything tasted like water chestnuts, celery, or cucumber. Bobby Flay's steaks were delic

ately marinated, sliced into strips, & sprinkled with sliced scallions. Then the strips were tightly rolled to form beef negimaki. This paired well with rice & hot or cold sake.

My mouth watered at the thought at the same time my stomach churned nauseatingly. Eating this beef negimaki, even with plenty of sake, would require mind over matter. I braced myse

lf by planting my lime green Doc Marten against the wall. I shoved the back of my chair into the stomach of the waiter, also part time sumo wrestler. He held my head straight in 2

which was only made easier for him because I had a gullet full of delicious calzone. And that wasn't the worst part of my dining out. A gorilla ordered that dancing squid at the

bar, making a lot of noise. The situation got more and more interesting.... what else could happen? Then I remembered that some of my life's biggest disasters started with this