It was the weekend I was standing naked on

It was the weekend I was standing naked on the balcony and saw that UFO. Ofcourse noone would have believed me, but then there was that article in the paper. Others saw it too.

"Man wakes from six year coma; claims return after alien abduction..." That was the Crop Circling Chronicler, but no matter. I knew it, and there were others who also knew about my

disappearance. There wasn't much time. I ran and carried only the essentials, my suitcase, my clothes, my fancy church hats, a batch of pot brownies and my bathing suit.

I also pulled a Radio Flyer wagon behind me, which contained my laptop computer, a pile of monster truck rally tickets, a honeycomb, and a one-of-a-kind collector's edition

action figure. Now these might seem like random components to you, but they had something in common. They were mine. And there was only one place I could bury them to keep them

concrete. Under layers of Donny and Marie posters, AM radios, and ET Atari cartridges, lies the tomb of GI Joe action figures (with beard.) Now the dog won't get 'em or my sister.

They have been burned. I did save one radio. My mum sat there writing a short story for her next collection, as yet untitled. I was a character, which was fine with me. Honeydew

Bellahbub was my name. Arresting cows was my job. For that was the most honorable occupation in my story. Mum flipped the page, as she sang more Hymns whispered in a Gaelic toun

but hollered in the wild woods near that toun. When all the cows had been arrested and executed we all ate well for a few weeks. After that it was all potato soup and bread.