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He jumped off the 18th floor but on his way

  • He jumped off the 18th floor but on his way down he was accidentally shot by an old man who was threatening his wife with a shotgun. The old man thought the gun was not loaded but

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  • it wasn't. It was like that scene from the movie about the flower? The one with the raining frogs? I'm sure Tom Cruise was in it. Anyway, what a coin-ki-dink. Weird stuff happens.

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  • "Yeah. Cool........ " They were out of topics to talk about. And being stoned, they found themselves staring at the wall, like it was some sort of portal to the realms of their un

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  • icorn-riding brethren, the Bong Hittites. Wally looked at Stan. Stan looked at Wally. "You thinking what I'm thinking?" "I dunno. Are you thinking

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  • about g-strings and yo-yo ma? Stan looked at Wally, "No, I'm not." Wally sighed, "I guess, then neither am I. What were you thinking?" Stan started thinking and

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  • answered, "I'm wondering what the heck a 'yo-yo ma' is." Stan nodded to Wally. Wally frowned in annoyance. Stan was the one who brought it up in the first place. Heavy sigh.

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  • Then I stepped to the left, jumped to the right, and did a pelvic thrust. Soon, I realized I was doing the Time Warp. Again. I really wish I'd stop doing that.

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  • But dancing like that during a cremation ceremony is the least of my worries. It's when I start dry heaving from my obese and underdressed siblings start

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  • er fluid they'd snuck into my flask that I really had concerns...cause I didn't know they did it until afterwards and MAN I really needed a smoke! Belching flammable burps and

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  • working as a fire fighter is somewhat difficult. So I changed my job to work as a blacksmith fashioning iron gates for wealthy private mansions.

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