The Dog Master knows all and sees all. The

The Dog Master knows all and sees all. The Dog Master never forgets a good belly rub, but never forgives the Old Ones for taking it to the vet. Legends tell of a battle so fierce

that people, hands over their mouths, are in disbelief. The Dog Master can speak Dogese. In fact, he's fluent in Dogese. He knows enough Catese to get by in Catworld. He's very

educated, and the Bird Master was threatened. The Dog Master was not just any hound. He was a Schnoodle, and nothing could change that...except

for the scientist named Vagrant. This evil brain basher has been working on a type of water called Hexahalolopintriouserpintinphibousbilycodroxide. The unfortunate side effext is

giving really long names to chemical compounds and expecting non-native speakers to understand you when discussing the finer points of brain bashing and the science of

so when the lights went off and a loud recording boomed "POP QUIZ!" there was palpable apprehension. Everyone in the audience was forcefully secured to their chair. The lights came

on and the recorded voice boomed, "WHO'S YOUR DADDY?" Chained to my seat, I peered to my left and shrieked. My friend was gone. In his place sat a dummy, but it was only a torso!

The torso' s nipples widened, then shrunk into hard little points. "AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!" I sh*t my pants then, after a monster erupted from its chest & screamed, "I'M YO DADDDDDY!!"

I did notice the family resemblance. Papa? After all these years? It would take a long time for us to be on speaking terms but we could muster through.