Thinking that, if Popeye gained temporary

  • Thinking that, if Popeye gained temporary super-strength from eating spinach, I might gain a superpower from ingesting a common vegetable, I began to eat nothing but lima beans for

  • ever. That was four years ago. The effects weren't actually as tangible as you might think. The most noteworthy change was that I began to think like a lima bean. I noticed

  • , for example, that I thought a lot about the teachings of Confucious. I didn't even know that this was what lima beans think about until I started thinking like a lima bean. I als

  • o now know that lima beans are really anti boiling water. I mean really, really against it. Apart from Confucious and liking water tepid, lima beans live lives of little commotion

  • in solitary focused samadhi. Lima Beans are the zen monks of legumes, the keepers of pulse wisdom. A wisdom almost lost in the great Bean-o-clism. It all started with Kidney beans

  • setting themselves up at the top rungs of bean social heirarchy. The podcasts stirred up the other lower beans to end this favatism. Master Azuki lead a faction of mexican jumping

  • beans to engage the Red Bean Army. "ATTENTION! Get down that vine and make hummus of them! And make it snap-peas!" A Red Bean spy beaned the bean-commander with a beam of beano

  • At the Tiny House Convention. The tiny houses were just the right size for the Red Bean Army and its stock of Beano. The Black Bean Army was equally well equipped. Beans and rice

  • alike suffered in the war that ensued. It was bean against bean. Legless legumes were showing up at the hospitals in droves and were fitted with tiny wheelchairs. Widow beans wept

  • watching their dismembered husbands carried off to the graveyard. Children beans' voices rose up and down through the days in an everlasting sob. But one bean was silent.



  1. SlimWhitman Aug 20 2016 @ 11:17


  2. KieferSkunk Aug 20 2016 @ 12:11

    Soy vey?

  3. KieferSkunk Aug 20 2016 @ 12:15

    It's bean fun. But it's chili here in the Great Northern states, so I must dip south to Lima. Oh, who am I kidneying? I'm not going anywhere. Gotta pea, brb.

  4. Woab Aug 20 2016 @ 16:36

    Possibly among the most cohesive folds that has ever bean. Slim's line about "favatism" was a gasser.

  5. SlimWhitman Aug 21 2016 @ 05:07

    Liked your legless legumes too-t. Speaking of which... http://foldingstory.com/tcxlp/

  6. Woab Sep 16 2016 @ 17:35

    Ulp- I think I just "got" the last line, Artistatwork! Boy, am I dense! Was he silent- but deadly?

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