A half-empty tin of Spongebob Squarepants

A half-empty tin of Spongebob Squarepants Band-Aids and the lingering scent perfume were all that were left of her. Just a few moments earlier

she'd reportedly stopped in at Rio Rump for a quick Brazilian wax. They waxed her alright...and now Lt. Harold had the responsibility of finding out what really happened to Gert.

Instead of a Bazilian Wax, the evil witch had "waxed" Gert by putting her in a human sized candle with the wick attached to her head. Lt. Harold was horrified

at the sheer leniency with which Gert was being treated by the witch. "You've lost your touch since '39" He muttered. Back then there wouldn't be so little gore and so much mercy

but you could still buy a sandwich for a nickel! The Sandwich Witch nodded wistfully. It was true; she had grown soft and beautiful with age, lacking the bitterness which fueled

Her former incarnation. The shop was named Samantha's Sandwiches. She was a fan of "Bewitched" and was assisted by Samantha and Tabitha. They did big business together.

Samantha took the orders They could've teleported customers money directly into the till but as good witches Sam & Tabitha twitched their noses & customers fave sammich appeared.

Militiamen burst into the tavern. "By order of the magistrate of Salem, we put thee, Samantha Stephens, & daughter Tabitha, under arrest for practicing witchcraft!" but Sam twitche

-d her nose and the militiamen wound up on top of Mt. Everest, where they soon died from the cold. "It's not my fault," said Samantha, "if they weren't prepared." She and Tabitha