The statisticians and the accountants gathered

The statisticians and the accountants gathered at the Oval in London to watch the Ashes test match. It could be 5 thrilling days of graphs, numbers, beer and cricket if

anyone else showed up. The statisticians and accountants looked around at the empty venue. Nigel was the first to speak. "Look, maybe we need to find a better way to showcase our

genitalia." There was a silence amongst everyone because they all hated Nigel. He always thought of so-called "new and creative" ways, but they all ended up to be retarded ideas.

Nigel was always first. He had blond curly hair. He was the main star in Top Secret. He dressed as a cow and when a calf went for milk he very eloquently waited for the calf

to finish before making his own way to the milking parlour. Although Nigel had tasted the fruit of Hollywood stardom, he now had to supplement his income as a part time cow. Dairy

Products were more in demand than ever, thanks to Elsie the cow doing commercials for Borden. There were a lot of gigs for these skills. Elsie was world famous ad a result of all

the ads that she added her adage to."My Milk is udderly scrumptious & my Milkshakes do a body good!" Farmer Bob was in love with Elsie & wrote a letter to propose to her. "Dear Els

ie, you are more than a cow, you are the person I love. Marry me?" Elsie was outraged. "Cows are less than people?" She stormed into Farmer Bob's house and trampled him to death.

Elsie the cow took Farmer Bob's broken body and threw it into the meat grinder. A month later, some people in Minnesota complained of bit of straw hat in their Clown Burgers.

The burger chain knew the drill. They were always getting sued over straw hats in their burgers. They considered it a cost of business. Elsie got away with it but learned a lesson.