The first thing I noticed, when I entered

The first thing I noticed, when I entered his room, was a picture of his sister. She died in an accident 3 years ago. It had been the epicenter of his breakdown. I had to hurry...

he was right behind me. I slid her picture behind the terrarium just as he entered. He walked in & plumped down on the ottoman. Her accident? Collecting one deadly bug too many.

“Mom!” I screamed. “What is it, Timmy?!” she snapped from downstairs. “Um… there’s a dead body up here.” There was a commotion as Mom stomped upstairs. “Do I have to do everything

myself, you incompetent child?" Timmy said, "Good heavens, Mother! You of all people should know that at age 8 my jaws could not be as large as yours. As for the corpse, how did it

get here?

I look around. Might as well get some shut eye. I used my field jacket as a pillow. The next morning I woke up dead. I had no idea how I got that way either. I did all the tests. I

checked the boxes ‘no breathing’ and ‘no heart beat.’ But I did have mobility, conscious and deep hunger. I flipped to the back of the field manual. ‘Congrats Zombie!’

suddendly i got hit by a car

As i laid there in the muck I had an epiphany that this was just a bad episode of Three’s Company and I was supposed to be a young Mr. Ferley during his stint in Korea as a clown.