And so it came to pass that we had to kill

And so it came to pass that we had to kill our love because it was too beautiful to bear. Now, 6 months later, what is this? Regret? Intimacy is like a drug, that pulls you back

under the guise of sex. And, sadly, I hadn't had any since we broke up 6 months ago...which is why I made the age old mistake of telling her I loved her. All really wanted was a

quick shag, banana sandwich & then a Starwars DVD but what I got was a raving bunny boiler and now I can't cope. I try telling her we're incompatible because I actually dislike sex

instruction videos, whereas she can't get enough of them, but she is having none of it and drops another bunny into the boiling cauldron. "Stop, please," I beg of her. "Only if you

get in the pot instead." "OK," I say. I hop in and I'm boiled to death. "You are boiled to death?" Yes. Who are you? How can you hear my thoughts? "It's alright. You're undergoing

gender reassignment surgery, so I can understand why you're a little emotional." he said. "No, I am literally being boiled to death, you don't seem to understand what I am saying..

". "Excuse me? I didn't catch that. What did you say?" he rhetorically questioned in a condescending tone as he used a pole to push the man's head under the boiling water.

"Glub glub glub. Gonna' have me a tasty Bulgobulgoman" said Baxbaxwalanuksiwe stirring the boiling broth with his Hamatsa pole. But Qominoqa, screeched. "Fool! Lobsterman not done!

"Who will ear the bodies?"