Brunhilda put down her fork. "Why are you

Brunhilda put down her fork. "Why are you wearing a stupid hat?" she asked her husband Jerry. "It helps me think." Her marriage vows hadn't mentioned how to deal with stupid hats

. Jerry'd never worn hats when they were dating. Brainchild, in fact, had always loved running her fingers through his thick glossy locks. But now here he sat, wearing this brown

Safeway bag folded into a paper boat, festooned with tubular balloons, toilet rolls, & a colorful paper Chanuka candelabra. Brainchild was embarrassed that Jerry wore his hat

cocked just to the right, indicating his political preference for radical nihilism. Jerry would ignite his hat nightly, irritating Brainchild, the son of a mechanical engineer.

Brainchild was suspended in a titanium high chair. Electrodes, wires, puss-filled tubes snaked into the base of his skull like vines. Two black robotic claws were attached to the c

rane lowering steel beams for Brainchild to bend with his mind. Scientists turned up the voltage as he hollered in agony, but slowly, the metal crumpled in mid air. The main doctor

Was not trained in sopliatopy so his assistant, Dr. Ahbcvkbvsky, performed the delicate operation on the Helius Corpus.Bob Dylan had just won the Nobel Prize for Literature, so he

was asked to read the Rite of Exorcism. "But, I'm Jewish", replied Dylan then he left with his Nobel Prize. Dr. Ahbcvkbysky shrugged and changed into his Clown Suit. He grabbed her

demons out of her soul and gave them a good talking-to. They shriveled like overcooked bacon and Dr. Ahbcvkbysky shook them over his salad, still wearing his clown suit. This did